Christmas Eve

These are the special times
Times we'll remember
These are the precious times
The tender times, we'll hold in our hearts forever
These are the sweetest times
These times together
And through it all one thing will always be true
The special times are the times I share with you
 -"These are the special times" by Christina Aguilera

It actually has been two days since Christmas Eve and I only posting it today. It is because I went home very late on that night and I worked on Christmas, so I didn't have the time to post this. However, the memories of that day is still etched deeply in my mind(Well, coz' it's only two days ago)


Guess where did I went to on Christmas Eve? Universal Studios Singapore(USS). It is AWESOME!! The place is so gorgeously designed and detailed that I felt like I'm actually there in 'Hollywood', 'New York', 'Madagascar', 'Far Far Away', 'The Lost World', 'Ancient Egypt' and a 'Sci-Fi City'!! USS is really cool!! I really liked Far Far Away(the castle in Shrek), coz' the castle looked exactly like in the movie and in the fairy-tales and it obviously did include the inside jokes of Shrek and other fairy-tales! The Sci-Fi City is very awesome too, being one of the mainstay of the entire USS, having the newly-opened Transformers ride which attracted the whole lot of visitors, and that you'll have to wait like 2 straight hours just for the ride alone(it's often VERY crowded, the queue is... VERY long). 


I went there together with three of my friends, and it really has been an entertaining, fulfilling and fun trip to USS. We took almost all the rides available, starting with the Madagascar Crate Adventure which is a slow river ride which is quite interesting for Madagascar fans(although all four of us ain't fans). Followed by a stroll to Far Far Away, where the 'twisted' fairy-tales come alive! We then took the "Enchanted Airways" which is actually a kid-sized roller coaster... And we actually took the Merry-Go-A-Round, OMG. The funny thing about the Merry-Go-A-Round is that a certain someone sat on... Hahas maybe I shouldn't say it here, or else I'll get killed XP


Moving on, we had our lunch at Loui's NY Pizza Parlour. Yes, we apparently ate pizza for lunch. Guess what's the size of the pizza. 20 INCHES. And how many of us? Four. I have to eat two freaking large slices of that pizza. And that's not the worst yet. After that meal, we went to 'Lights, Camera, Action!' to view the special effects made by Steven Spielberg! We were 'blown away' as the sound stage changed into a setting hit by a major hurricane. The flames were intense, the effects were very real and the sound synchronisation made it perfect. Then I realised why I'm so into Steven Spielberg films.


We continued our way to Sci-Fi city and took the 'Accelerator'. It's the spinning cup thing that is on every theme park. Alright, here comes the BIG challenge. We are to then proceed to take the Battlestar Galactica roller-coaster ride. Remember I ate two slices of pizza? And I took the spinning 'Accelerator'? Now you're asking me to take one of the most thrilling roller coaster ride ever? My stomach will become a washing machine(the spinning type). We took the 'Human' ride(the red path) of the roller coaster since it looks "less scarier" than the 'Cylon' ride(the blue path), which includes a corkscrew, a rainbow 360 degree and several spins? And guess what, the four of us sat at the front row of the ride. How unlucky. We are all damn nervous, and my heart is racing...


Whoosh!! Before we knew it, the ride ended. Me and the guy friend(the 4 of us are 2 guys and 2 girls) strode to the 'Cylon' Ride, while the other two girls waited of us. By that time, I'm already feeling nauseous, and I still have to go through yet another roller coaster ride. This time, however, is very different from the first. All the spins, the corkscrew, the cobra roll and a vertical loop. It's very exciting!! If I didn't feel nauseous, I would probably have tried the rides again! After we got off, we called the girls to try the Cylon ride too, which they eventually did.


Next stop: Ancient Egypt. We went to the Ancient Egypt zone and wanted to ride the 'Revenge of the Mummy' indoors ride. That one, I admit, I was too scared to ride in total darkness, so in the end I didn't try that ride(two of my friends did). We didn't really explore The Lost World as the rapids adventure was undergoing some changes so we went back to Far Far Away to catch Shrek 4D Adventure. That is considered my first 4D experience and it was marvellous, really! 


Yes, finally we are lining up for the Transformers 3D ride. Within 40-50 mins, we were in! Oh, I think "awesome" is an understatement for that ride!! It is freaking cool!! The effects, the graphics, the entire interior design all matches for that exciting ride! The only downside is that the ride is too short. But well, it's definitely worth the tickets!!


Nearing the end of our trip to USS, the four of us loitered around to take more pictures. As it's already past seven, the lights were lit, the Christmas Tree were lit and the place looked even more beautiful than ever. Eventually we exited USS, and slowly took our time to savour the gorgeous view and wonderful experience that day. 


The song "These are the special times" played while we continued to take photos just outside of USS, and it really fits the mood and my inner voice. I guess I'm really lucky coz' my aunt won the lucky draw, winning 4 USS tickets, and she gave all to me since she can't make it and the tickets are gonna expire soon. I have to really thank her for the tickets, or else I probably won't get a chance to visit USS anytime soon. I don't know if I'm lucky that it rained(slightly) on that day, but I'm sure am very lucky to have my aunt, and of course my friends who accompanied me to USS. I've never had so much fun on Christmas Eve before, so this is my best Christmas Eve ever! You guys totally made my day. You guys, just by being there with me at USS, is already a very big Christmas present for me. Thanks for everything!

Reputation

"It takes decades to build up a reputation, but it only takes an instant to destroy it."


What's the trending topic in Singapore? We all know it. The breakdown of the MRT transport. It all started on last Thursday. It was at the rush hour in the evening, when the people who are working at the Central Business District, take their usual transport home. There it happened. The MRT train suddenly broke down. The train stopped moving, the lights were dimmed, the built-in air-conditioner stopped working. Basically, the entire train went out of power. And the people who were rushing home were trapped in the train.


It was reported that the air ventilation was really bad that one person almost fainted, then a on-board passenger had no choice but to break the windows to allow air in. For about one hour or so, the commuters were left stranded in the train. Eventually they were gotten out of the train, led out of the underground tunnel to the nearest station. However, the train disruption caused a big part of the North-South line to be sealed. South-bound trains resumed at 9pm while north-bound trains resumed operations at 11:40pm. 


For more than 4 hours, the train services stopped. People had to turn to bus bridging services to get to their destinations. If this isn't bad enough, how about a second breakdown? Or even a third time? And subsequent train delays? The SMRT company even pushed back the train services to start at 11am, instead of the usual 5am+. I think there's no need for me to describe how this will affect the working population of Singapore. Indeed, it is a serious problem.


This problem has plagued us for 5 days already. There are heated debates online, most are angry that this actually happened, while there're others who still kept their cool and continue their support for the SMRT. The SMRT has already apologised to the public for this terrible string of incidents. But really, is an apology enough? Yes, the company may be doing their best to solve the problem and prevent similar cases from happening in the future. They also followed the procedures appropriately, getting bus-bridging services, and doing a thorough check and maintainence. But people out there are still angry and disappointed at what happened. I can't blame them though. 


For 24 years, the MRT trains has served us without fail. But just this once, the situation is so bad, then almost everybody started cursing the company. We were unhappy that the MRT cabins are always so filled up, and people have to squeeze, especially during the rush hours in the morning and the evening. We were unhappy that we have to wait for the second train, the third or even the fourth before we can finally squeeze into the cabin. Every year, they say they will improve, they will get more trains, decrease the train intervals, so as to accommodate the huge numbers of commuters. But still, the situation didn't really change much. 


Perhaps we shouldn't take things for granted, however, are those people really trying their best to improve the train service? Or do they just care about earning money? Well, it's up for debate. I think it's rather amusing, how a reputation just crumbles because of one incident, especially in such a developed country like Singapore.

Redress

Each generation wants new symbols, new people, new names. They want to divorce themselves from their predecessors. - Jim Morrison

I've resigned from my telemarketing job! Yes, I feel so free now. No longer have to mass call strangers all over the country. No longer have to stand the utter rudeness of some people who picked up my calls, no longer have to suffer the mental torture of being rejected over and over again. No longer have to feel the guilt of not hitting the daily target. Whew! Thankfully, I still got a waiter job which I can still earn a small income. Speaking of which, even my friend who originally introduced me into his telemarketing company, resigned due to my influence! But, that's not the main point of this post, or else the title would be "Resign" instead. 

Just yesterday, me and another of my friend, went to play basketball at a nearby park. It's just the two of us, so we just grabbed a ball, and went shooting hoops. As we arrived at the basketball court, I saw a familiar face. I don't recall writing SPECIFICALLY about this incident, but I think I did actually wrote about this very briefly in a post somewhere in this blog. This familiar face turns out to be the guy together with another two "kids"(they don't look anything like teenagers. They may be secondary one students, but they don't behave like one, neither do they look like one), who actually humiliated me and my friends in a basketball match.

If you guys have read all my previous posts, you'll find that there's a lot of similar incidents, and all of that I've experienced, it's always gotta do with basketball. Well, please don't be  biased to this sport coz' all the bad stuff has nothing gotta do with the sport. Basketball is a competitive sport, so is many other sports such as soccer, volleyball etc. The same incidents would have happened in these sports too. 

Anyways, getting back to the topic, lemme give yet another brief description of what happened between me and him. Two of my friends and I were playing basketball, at our half of the same court. They were playing at their other half, and after a while, they came over and 'challenged' us to a match. A 'friendly' match. After a brief discussion, we accepted it. The match starts, and we were losing by a wide margin(note: I wasn't anywhere near playing seriously, just trying to have fun). 

Since my two other friends were not good at the sport, neither do they play basketball often, we obviously were weaker. But the thing is that, the opponents played dirty. They hit my friend's arms and hands, snatching away the ball from him not just once, but several times. Besides that they humiliated us, by trying to set-up all kinds of tricks. I can no longer just stand there and chill after watching my friend getting bullied just because he can't play basketball well. I took charge and took revenge. We didn't even bother to count the score,  I just take the ball and start dropping shots one after another. Eventually we lost(coz' we didn't count the score).

That's rather brief, I think? Anyways, I didn't like them a bit. Neither did my two friends. They were obnoxious. Well, going back to my trip to the basketball court, I saw that guy again. As me and my friend entered the court, we saw this bunch of sec one 'kids' at the court playing basketball. When everybody arrived, I counted 23 of these 'kids' at the court. And 10 basketballs. Me and my friend just went to the other half of the court to shoot hoops, then the guy(that familiar guy) politely asked us to leave, coz' they need the entire court. We sat down and watched them play a full-court match which has 12 people in the court at the same time. After a couple of minutes, they got 5 girls to join into the game. Which means 17 in the court. 17 people, 2 teams, 2 hoops, 1 basketball. Talk about messy. I've never quite seen anything like that since my primary school days. I think even primary school kids nowadays are better at organising stuff than this bunch of people.

Being a spectator, I was laughing all the way. It's just so messy that I have absolutely no idea what's going on. One moment the ball was at this side of the court, and the other moment, it flew straight to the other side. It's just so epic to see them play. Really, it's like watching a bunch of rowdy and playful, lower primary school kids(no offence) play. Here's the catch. I've witnessed these 'kids' spouting vulgarities like nobody's business, witnessed their temper flaring, them committing flagrant and violent fouls, seeing them play so roughly. Trust me, the tension there could explode any time. A fight could have occurred. Looking at how they played, they certainly deserve some redressing.

Looking at them, I was reminded of my younger days, in primary school as well as my lower secondary school days. Was I that bad? Was the people born in my year, as bad as the them? I concluded: No. We weren't that bad then. I am worried about our younger generation. We are teenagers now, almost becoming young adults, but it seems like we are far more mature than the 'kids' I've seen, even at their age. I'm glad, but it sends a shiver down my spine when I think that these 'kids' will become adults, and have to shoulder the burdens of the world. Will they be matured enough by then? Or will they... I don't dare to think of the undesired outcome.

Working Experience

"Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same." - Francesca Reigler


I completed my third day at work as a telemarketer, and my try-out day as a waiter in a cafe. Well, the work as a telemarketer is very mentally draining and stressful. After about 12 hours of mass calling, getting countless "not interested" answers, "busy" answers, and rude replies, I am sick and tired of calling any more strangers. The original target was to get 4 appointments each day (since I'm working 4 hours a day), but after 3 days of calling, I only managed to get only ONE appointment (4 x 3days = 12 appointments which is my target). It made me feel damn guilty. Also it's damn tiring to face rejection all the time. I almost developed a phobia of calling because of this work.


I tried to show a positive attitude in my work and cheer myself up, but it's not that easy. C'mon, if you can't stand working for just 3 days, how can you survive a month? Since I've gotten the waiter job, I might as well quit being a telemarketer and finally put an end to my misery, right? I rather get lower pay, longer working hours but have a nice environment with nice people to work with and able to enjoy myself while working, than to work with higher pay, less working hours, but feeling damn stressed, guilty, getting rejected all the time, mentally draining and bored? (I realise I used a lot of commas here. Poor English T.T)


Speaking of the waiter job, I had my trial together with my friend yesterday night. It was fun, entertaining, simple, and have such nice people to work with. My other primary school friend who has been working there for 2 months, he showed us the ropes yesterday, what we should do and how we should go about doing it. Our boss is also a very friendly and gentle person. Our colleagues - The kitchen chef auntie, the bartender who makes drinks, the other co-worker, they are all very friendly as well, and are willing to teach us. They made us feel at home, and I felt that we all had already met for a long time already. 


Besides carrying out my duties as a waiter, helping out at the counter, and cleaning up as well, there's one more thing about this cafe. It's a special cafe that has a very soothing ambience, and there's a band (not the 'rock' type of band) who perform song requests by customers. It's very entertaining to listen them performing, as well as listening to frequent jokes cracked by the performers which entertained the customers and us. Most of the songs sang are chinese pop songs, and listening to these songs reminded me why I first fell in love with chinese songs and why I'm so keen in learning the chinese language, and I am so proud of having chinese language as my mother tongue. The singers sang really well and it's so refreshing, I think that's why the cafe attracts customers. 


This cafe main customers are couples who came here seeking the lovely and romantic ambience here, having a drink and some snacks, while listening to their own song requests with their loved ones. Someday, I would like to invite my closest friends there and have a meal there, I'm sure it will be a very cool experience. Well, that's what I thought... Until I saw the prices on the menu.


P.S You see the highlighted words? You can also change them to my girlfriend (If I already have one by then :P) and romantic

Interview

Just a short update. Well, I've had my second official interview and finally landed a job today. So starting tomorrow, I'll be working. As expected, the holidays are already slipping away day by day and after a month or so, we are expected to receive our O-Levels results and have to decide on which post-secondary schools to apply for. It may be more than a month away but we all know how fast time flies. As for the interview I've had, it's like an oral exam. I gotta do a role-play and converse with my 'boss', speaking and prompting questions at a speedy pace. Sounds like a piece of cake? Well, looking at how I've performed during the interview, it's nowhere near 'difficult'. I really hope that I'm capable of doing this job, and I better not screw up. 

The Brotherhood

There's no other love like the love for a brother. There's no other love like the love from a brother. - Astrid Alauda 

This post is dedicated to my fellow Brotherhood. For those who don't know, The Brotherhood is my very own clique within my school. My other nickname for this clique is "Espada". To those who had watched Bleach(the manga or anime), it is known that "Espada" is actually a "villain" organisation consisting of the top 10 most powerful "villains". It just so happens that there're actually 10 members within The Brotherhood. And the word "Espada" has been frequently used among ourselves to "praise" someone who did something brilliant. (Note: it could be sarcastic sometimes)

The name "Brotherhood" was actually given to us by our hated Math teacher, as we guys were all seated at the left side(from the view of the teacher). This group was actually founded as 9 of us used to go out to have lunch together frequently. Then one more person eventually joined this group and we became 10. 

We went to places like Pepper Lunch, Pastamania, Pizza Hut, McDonald's, KFC and more, to have lunch together. We of course had lots of fun just hanging around and chilling out with one another after school. We played Soccer, Basketball, and "Self-Invented" Baseball among ourselves. We went on numerous outings, like the most recent one where we went The Cage to play soccer indoors there, went to buy a jersey as wedding gift for our beloved teacher Mr See and so on. All the times we laughed whenever something funny occurred or something funny was said, all the times we tried to make fun of a particular member and that priceless expression on his face, or the "words" he said. There's so much things we had done as a group that I obviously didn't bother to count how many exactly.

Of course there were times where not all ten members are present, due to various reasons, but we are still bonded together as a group. We also have quarrels here and there, putting our personal relationships with one another into tests. Exchanging heated words, voice raised at each other, sometimes even leading to them being cold towards each other. But who didn't get into quarrels with friends, best friends before? So long as we overcome it, work it out, our friendship will get even stronger.

Every person is different, we have our own differences. But we put aside our differences and resolved our conflicts, bonding as one. Of course, our differences still exist, but we are learning to be more selfless, and accept one another's personality and desires. Ten people is considered quite a big clique, since most cliques are like perhaps four or five? Maybe seven at most? I'm not sure, but putting ten guys together and be able to stand united, is not easy. I can't say that we are very successful in doing it but at least we had great memories together. We spent our teenage years and our secondary school days together, I'm sure that it will remain as a beautiful piece of memory.

Like a few members of The Brotherhood, I have imagined us, all grown-up as adults, maybe aged around 24... or even older like 30, and we'll have a Brotherhood gathering, where we'll see everyone again, with matured faces, when we'll get to see Mr See's children growing up as well, and Mr See himself getting old. I really loved all the times we were together, good or bad, and I thank each and every single Brotherhood member for being my best friends and my "Brothers", and for making my life entertaining, and fun. I really wish that this wonderful relationship among ourselves will last... Brothers till the end.

P.S We still haven't take a full exclusive photo for the entire Brotherhood yet! T.T
We have to take one before we all separate and leave for our post-secondary educations!

Marriage

"if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.”

Today is the day where my favourite teacher Mr Sherman See marries his love of his life, Constance Kang. Me, being one of his students from his form class 4E, as well as the rest of 4E are invited to their wedding ceremony. Yes, we went to the church to witness the eternal bonding of Mr See and his now-wife. It was my first time being in a church to witness the holy matrimony. 


I can only describe it as romantic, beautiful and touching... Truly, love cannot be described by words alone. From the way the bride strolled on the aisle with flowers on the ground, how she walked with such grace and the look in the Mr See, the groom when he's waiting to receive his bride, where both are dressed in their best, his tuxedo and her wedding gown... We often joked about how "under-dressed" Mr See usually is, but today he certainly looked his best, making 4E girls "squeal" at the sight of him. Did I mention that quite a number of 4E girls are crazy over our beloved form teacher? He is like the perfect guy, that almost every girl dreamt of? 


Finally, when both the bride and groom took their Marriage Vows... It was a perfect moment. Hearing both the groom and bride say "I do" just like what always happen in dramas on TV, in real life it was such a beautiful sight. A true fairy-tale.



I, (name), take you, (name), to be my (husband/wife), my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

Yes, I found it! The Marriage Vow Mr See and his wife swore in front of everybody present in the ceremony. This is a golden moment, where dreams become reality.

As the couple exchanged rings, and received Matrimony Blessings, all of us were just so touched and so glad for Mr See. When Mr See finally lift the bride's veil and the couple kissed, everybody was just moved.

"I pronounce you, Husband and Wife"

It all ended with cheers and applause. We are definitely happy for Mr See. I'm really glad to be his student and thankful for all the times we had together.

"Congratulations, Mr and Mrs See"

P.S I wonder how my wedding will be like :P

P.S (part 2) Who's gonna be my bride XD

You are the apple of my eye

我想成为一个很厉害的人，因为有了我，让这个世界，而有一点点的不一样；而我的世界，不过就是妳的心。

I watched this movie twice this week. It is a really great movie. For those who didn't catch it, it has a really nice, nostalgic and "fairy tale"-like "love" plot with their days in high school as a setting. It's a true event that occurred to the director himself(so it's actually his story, so he's the "real" main male lead). This movie certainly brings back memories of youth to the adult and mature audience and entertains the teenage audience with a school love plot and hilarious jokes. Well... I got a feeling that I'm gonna catch the movie a THIRD time, perhaps changing people to go with.
This movie sure is a near complete reflection of the school days we just had in our secondary school. The friends around me, the hatred towards hardcore studying... and of course the puppy-love all around the school. Heh, I wonder whether I'll have such a beautiful and touching story like the director himself. The Chinese quote all the way above was said by the male lead during the movie, when the group shared their own ambitions. For those who don't understand, it meant that the male lead want to be a very influential person who wished to change the world, even if it's only a bit. And the girl he likes is his "world". This quote totally rocks! I wished I was the one who said that, hahas!

"Always Coming From Take Me Down"

Graduation Night

"You looked stunning that night. And I've forgotten to tell you that."


Well, the Graduation Night is officially over. Over three nights ago. All the glamour, the excitement, the fun is over as well. Truth be told, our secondary school days are over. We're not getting another chance at this. We're no longer secondary school students. It has been an amazing night. To see everyone dressed to the nines, looking their best just for this once-in-a-lifetime event. This night will forever be etched in my heart. 
We had lots of fun during dinner, with one of my best pals dancing on stage, looking so silly that made me laugh madly. Then there's other marvellous performance by a few of our schoolmates, and games to play around or should I say "fool" around. Truly it's a very entertaining night as well. The host didn't fool us by putting the title as "Masquerade: A Night To Remember". It's really an unforgettable experience for every one of us. 
When the lights dimmed and we were shown a video compilation of all of our years we had in this school, I was simply filled with such mixed feelings. The feeling when you leave your school. When everything is over, the cohort stood and strolled around, asking to take pictures with one another. It might be the last time we'll see each other, so we should take pictures together to keep our memories alive while we were formally dressed. Everybody looked great on that night. I really wished that we can all spend more time together as a cohort, but our way of life simply doesn't allow that. We all have to leave one another, and we will have to embrace a new beginning in our post-secondary school education. I will miss all of you. Must remember to miss me too!

Eve of Graduation Night

“If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.” - Nora Roberts


Well, the title says it all. Today is the Eve of my school's Graduation Night. After tomorrow night, we won't be seeing each other as often as we do now. All of my schoolmates. In the end, I'm truly glad that I've met you guys in this school. I believe that it wasn't coincidence that brought us together in this school. It could be Fate. It could be God. It have been a really fun experience for me. I'm sure every one of us has somehow grown and developed ourselves and our personal qualities over the past 4 years. Looking back, I realised that I am no longer the same person who had first walked into this school. Time really flies.
Graduation Night is also known as "Prom Night" for obvious reasons. We will be wearing formal clothes and masks since it's a Masquerade Party. Hmm... I wonder what everybody else will wear tomorrow. If the previous Dining Etiquette was a hint of what's gonna come, I'd bet tomorrow will truly be "A Night to Remember" (That's the theme of this entire thing, hahas)


Besides all the glamour and stuff during the Graduation Night, I suppose there's something else I gotta do. The song "What Hurts The Most" by Rascal Flatts is very meaningful. I guess there's only just this one last chance to say what I wanted to say to the people whom are precious to me. I may(well, 'probably') regret saying it, but if I don't, I'll definitely have to live with this regret. 


It's better to cross the line and suffer the consequences than to just stare at that line for the rest of your life.

Relax (After)

What can I say? It's over. 


Well, it really IS over. More than 13 hours ago, I've finished my O's. There is nothing else I can do about it. I can only just chill and laze around, do the things I originally wanna do after the O's. Way before the O's even started, I had a lot of things in mind. I actually wanted do a lot of things after the O's. Hang out with my ex-classmates, my 'current' classmates (we already graduated from our school together but still considered as 'current'), go hardcore gaming (Not as 'hardcore' as you might think), play intensive sports over and over again like basketball and soccer and a lot more. I dunno why but ever since the O's is declared 'over' for me, I don't feel any more excited to do all these stuff I wanna do. I just don't feel the joy. 
It's supposed to be a joyous occasion, I mean, when you finally finish the examination you've been preparing for, for the past 4 years, and you should feel at least lifted from the burden of studying, if not, actually you should go all crazy. Freedom at last! Yet, I don't really feel it. Man, I still feel like I'm gonna have yet another paper tomorrow (speaking of which, good luck to those still having papers tomorrow). It feels just as though yet another burden has been put onto my shoulders.
I don't really know why... Well actually I do. I'm worrying about something else. And perhaps that 'something else' I'm worrying about, proved to be a tougher challenge and a bigger worry than the O's itself. Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating. Maybe it's not as tough or as big a worry like the O-Levels, but still it's quite a big cause of worry. I don't know what to do about it. I keep asking myself whether I should do this or do that, and keep answering my own questions by stating the advantages and disadvantages of this and that, then leading to a counter-argument. Confused is not the right word. It can be said that "I'm at loss at what to do". I always thought that I can relax after the O's, even if it's only for a while. Now I know that I was wrong. When can I finally relax?

Relax (Before the End)

It's all gonna be over soon.


A couple of times I wished it won't end. Really, I wished the O-Levels won't end at least this quickly. It just flashed past us, like lightning. I am taking my final paper tomorrow. Of course there will still be people who will have papers on the day after or so. But a portion of us will finish our O's tomorrow. Not that I wanna study again for my examinations, but I wanna spend more time with my classmates and schoolmates. We won't be seeing one another as often as we do now. I'll really miss my classmates and many of my schoolmates. From tomorrow onwards, I can finally relax and chill out. Be myself all over again. I'll have to relinquish myself back to the real me. The "Not-So-Serious" Me. Hahas, I bet that he will go all crazy tomorrow after finishing the last paper. Or maybe he won't. 
I seriously wonder how it will feel like finishing the O's. I can imagine it, but I don't know how I will react to the sudden change. I mean, it's gonna be over. When I step out of the hall after submitting my paper, everything will end. My time with my classmates and schoolmates will end. The studying and revising for tests, examinations will end. I don't know whether I should be happy about it. But well, I should be glad that my O's will be over soon. Time to finish this.


Countdown to the end of O-Levels: Less than 11 hours.

Reprove

Often I must think before I speak. This is called diplomacy. - Stilgar


I've finished my week of horror where I had six papers. And out of these six, five of 'em are my weak subjects. There's only 4 papers left, and Freedom awaits...
As expected, I didn't do any better for my Additional Mathematics. I'd screwed it all up. Let's not talk about it. As for Chemistry Paper 2, I didn't do well, but at least I expect a passing grade which is already considered an achievement for me(I'm 'destined' to fail Chemistry) and I still have Paper 1 which is Multiple-Choice Questions(MCQs) where I have to score as high as possible. As for Physics Paper 2, I didn't do very well either, wrote some crap down for a few questions coz' I totally forgot/didn't know how I should go about doing it. Still, I'm putting my trust in my MCQs paper coming next week. For Geography, it's not too bad, I feel that I can pass if nothing goes terribly wrong. For social studies, it isn't a problem and I expect my A1 if I can score for my History. But well, quite a huge percentage of my cohort did the "Conflict in Sri Lanka" question, and it will probably moderate the scores down... T.T please don't strip me of my A1... And how did my prophecy of the "Conflict" theme coming out for the exam get spread out???
Well since I didn't have time to elaborate on stuff last week, I intend to do it today. Last week, after the E-Math paper 1, the answers for the paper had been uploaded on a website on that very day(it's an national exam!). People in my cohort spread the news and the website amongst ourselves and beyond. I had been told by my friend about it and went to the website to check(there's where I gotta know all my careless mistakes etc.). Everybody seemed to do very well for that paper and a few even posted their scores online. Wow. What can I say? A few(I can't remember how many so I just put "a few") commented on how freaking easy that paper was and was so proud of themselves for only making one or two careless mistakes. As E-Math papers are very logical, the only way to get marks deducted is to get careless. 
Seriously? Posting your own score online? There are other people who didn't do well, who made more careless mistakes, totally demoralised, and all they can see online are the scores someone else gotten? "If it's so easy, why didn't you score full marks?" Man, I like this quote. I'm not targeting at anyone, but please learn to be humble and considerate.


Countdown to the end of O-Levels: Less than 9 days

Short Update

Well, here's just a short update of my O-Levels. I don't have time to write a complete essay about it until next week, so here's what happened the past few days. I finished my English Paper and Mathematics Paper. It's not entirely a milk run for English, which I expected myself to do better. Mathematics Paper was fairly easy, but still, I've made quite a number of careless mistakes and I'm rather demoralised that people did a lot better. My nemesis, Additional Mathematics Paper is is just tomorrow and I have to really start my revision for it in order to at least secure an adequate grade. Tomorrow onwards will be a very busy week for me as Additional Math, Chemistry, Physics, Geography and Social Studies are in it. 4 of my very weak subjects just came rushing at me at the same time. God bless me.


Countdown to the end of O-Levels: Less than 16 days.

Recall

"Do your best."


This is it. The O-Levels is gonna start today. Just a few hours later, I'll be sitting in my school hall and taking my English paper. Surprisingly, I seem very chilled now. Not much anxiety or fear. That's how I always look on the outside. But deep inside, I'm fighting inner battles. 
I recall three years ago, after me and my parents went to my school for Meet-The-Parents Session and to collect my report book for my Secondary One year, we took the train back home together. While on the train, I met this man. I cannot totally remember how he looks like and in my memory, he looks about 50-60 years old (he's not a frail old man) He came forward and asked me whether I'm from Presbyterian High School, from the looks of my PE shirt. I answered "Yes." He then told me about his son which is from the same school as well, and who already graduated from university and became a lawyer (if I remembered correctly). He encouraged me to do my best in my studies. We are total strangers, yet I like I've known him. As me and my parents listened attentively, I got this feeling that this person is God-sent. That perhaps he's an angel in disguise, sending God's word to me. I told myself that one day I will need this encouragement and I will always remember this encounter. That day is today.
I recall on another occasion two years ago, during my dad's company's annual dinner night, my family was invited (so it's me and my parents). Then before the event commences, All of us were to wait at the lounge. At the lounge then was my dad's company's employees and their families. As I walked around with my dad, he introduced me to one of his colleagues. His colleague was really friendly and talked about me and my studies. He told me that my parents are working very hard to support the family and me and encouraged me to work hard and do well for my studies to secure a bright future and to support my parents. After that, I shook his hand firmly. "Don't worry, I will."
I recall a lot of things. All the messages from my friends, the farewell letters written by my classmates, the motivation and encouragement from my family and friends... All will serve their purpose. All the best to my friends and classmates. One shot, let's make it count. This is it. It's time to roll.


Countdown to the start of O-Levels: 3 hours and 30 Minutes.
Countdown to the end of O-Levels: Less than 20 days.

Revision

"I'm not telling you it is going to be easy - I'm telling you it is going to be worth it." - Arthur T.Williams


I've just finished up yet another failed attempt to revise my subjects for the upcoming O-Levels. I haven't been able to fully concentrate and focus on the task at hand during this period of time. There're too much distractions. Or maybe I'm just easily distracted. I'm sure quite a number of people have this problem too. Motivation isn't enough to make me study hard. I know I have to study and get all the stuff into my head and make it stick for at least three weeks. However, I just fade away from my study table and let my mind wander around all the time. Yes, I'm even doing it now by writing this post. It's yet another escape from my revision. Since the previous week, I've realised that I'm very weak at certain subjects. I know so little about them. There's just no way for me to catch up now. All I can do, is to try to cram everything in my head and pray that I absorbed and memorised the concepts. I'm getting serious but things just don't go my way huh?
Anyways, on last Thursday, I've discovered that a lot of my friends are using tumblr. I've visited a few of their websites and seen the usefulness and appeal of tumblr. So maybe I should switch to using tumblr instead? But I can't abandon this blog, can I? So I've decide to continue posting here. Oh yes, speaking of my blog, I've realised that this blog has been discovered by my friends! A few close friends is fine but it's not just a few. I unknowingly placed it in my twitter profile, hoping to get the twitter feed here, and my followers (which are mostly my friends) can see it and that's how they made it here. Oh gosh...


Countdown to the start of O-Levels: Less than 2 days.
Countdown to the end of O-Levels: Less than 22 days.
That means approximately 20 days of torture.
Wish me luck.

Responsibility

You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today. - Abraham Lincoln


5 more days to the start of O-Levels. That's just great. I don't even feel prepared yet. Yet instead of revising, I'm actually writing another post. I think that this is gonna be my second or third last post until the end of O-Levels, unless there're certain incidents that may happen during this period. Seriously, I can't wait for the O-Levels to end. It's like 25 days away. It's so close yet so far... Feels like I can grasp it already but there's a huge obstacle standing in my way...


Anyway, if you guys did watch the news (I don't know whether it's broadcasted to other countries), you should probably know about what happened in China. A young girl got ran over by a van. And you know what? That driver totally ignored her. He just drove off. After the incident, as the girl is left lying there, at least 18 people walked past her and didn't help her. They just plainly walked off, ignoring her. I mean, how could you just walk off when you see a young child lying on the road, bleeding profusely and who obviously needed help?? They didn't care although they noticed her. A woman even picked the girl up and tossed her to the side of the road like trash. To add on, another truck came later and ran over her as well. Nobody came forward and tried to help. Calling an ambulance, getting her out of there... Practically, the girl is left for dead until a rubbish collector discovered her and shouted for help which several shopkeepers ignored her. He then finally tracked down the girl's mother who then rushed her to the hospital. I think the words are "Cruel and Unfeeling". Wait, that's an understatement. It's inhumane. These people... I wonder how can they sleep at night without feeling any guilt and remorse. 
News just reported that the girl is alive and but not out of danger. Her parents are really sad and depressed that this horrible incident happened and they are really worried for their daughter's life. Also, the driver did not want to be imprisoned so he continue to escape from the police. Who wants to be imprisoned? But you have just ran over a little girl and drove off. You did not stop immediately and call an ambulance. It's a hit-and-run! It's just plain sick. That driver just shrank from his responsibility, so did those who ignored the girl.

Reveal

I hate to lose more than I love to win - Jimmy Connors


I'll try my best to continue to post as much as I can during this period of time when I should be revising. So don't blame me if this blog appears dead for about 3 weeks.


Anyways, in this post I'll reveal something about myself. To those who know me well, or those who think they know me, they will probably know about this particular trait I possess. Of course, the quote on top says it all: I hate losing. Yes, I hate losing more than I love to win. Although I must justify something about this aspect of myself. If I ever lose a team soccer game which I'm fairly poor at playing, I won't dislike the fact that I lost unless the other guy taunted me or my team, and stood there gloating and bragging. If I had fun playing in any game or sport and there's sportsmanship on both sides, why would I be unhappy about it even if I lose in the process. It could even be something that I'm good at, but so long I'm having fun, and everybody else is having fun, we're laughing and enjoying ourselves, there's no reason for me to be unhappy.
However, sometimes I really hate it when I lose. Especially to someone who does not deserve to win. If you guys had read deeper into my blog, you would know about the previous Basketball incidents. Yes, the post's titled "Respect". That's one example. The other one is when I'm put into a disadvantaged situation against someone and I obviously lost, and the opponent(s) thinks that I'm actually lousy when I could've defeated them easily if we played fair and square. Like maybe I'm thrown into a team that has little knowledge and skill to play a game against the obviously stronger team who will eventually win. That's another example of my reasons for hating to lose. I hate to lose when I could have won, and when I should have won. Some people really need to shut up, and thrashing them is a way of shutting them up, don't you think so? 
Sometimes I'm afraid of losing instead of hating to lose. I'm not bragging but I'm (probably) one of the best Chinese Chess player of my age and I'm afraid that if I have made a critical and silly mistake in the process and resulted in me losing, I'll lose my reputation of being the "Best", or it will give an golden opportunity of my opponent to gloat, brag and sing of their single victory against me (coz' by then I would've a record of 20+Wins to 1 Loss against that guy). It's been very long since I've played Chinese Chess, and I am certain that my reaction, observation and anticipation skills all have 'rusted' after all this time. Perhaps I should start to play again when the O's are over? Yes, this is the pressure of being at the top of the mountain when challengers just keep threatening your 'throne'.
I certainly hate people thinking that they are better than me when actually it's the other way round. Sometimes I just wanna say, "Please, you'll never catch up to me. Don't act like you did." In Basketball, I'm not anywhere near 'good' in the sport I admit, but there are a lot more people in my school who play worse than me, and yet they thought that they are better than me. I'm not a scorer, I'm a playmaker. I dish out assists and acts as the floor general, and I only take the shot or lay-up when necessary. And Basketball is only a hobby although I'm so passionate about it. I'm not thinking of advancing to professional or anything. All I wanted was to have fun with my friends and improve myself to a certain extent. Nothing more. But there're those people who make me hate losing to them. In normal cases, I don't even feel anything bad about losing, but these people make me wanna just thrash them and leave it. It could be a Basketball match, a console game, or even comparing scores in examinations. Winners should act like winners. Or else, why should they deserve to win?


Everyone says, "I don't want to lose." Magic and Larry Said, "I'll kill you if I lose." - 'When the Game is ours' by Jackie MacMullen

Rebut

It all depends upon where the observer is standing. - Leto


This post is probably gonna be one of my last posts (or just the last post) till the O-Levels finish. The O-Levels are only 2 weeks away. 14 days. I really need the time to focus on my revision and finally be able to score high or more than adequate for my weaker subjects as well as my stronger subjects. I will need to go through consultations with my teachers to build on my weak topics and so on. I really need to score As or high B grades in order to secure my place in the Junior College of my choice. I'm probably aiming for Anglo-Chinese Junior College for its Humanities Scholarship, but I'll need to meet a criteria for about 7/8 points. It's not gonna be anywhere near easy for me. So I'm gonna apologise if my blog is found rather dead during this period of time as I need the time which is quickly running out.
Back to the topic, me and my friend decided to meet on yesterday (it happened yesterday, but I am writing it today) to find clothes for our Graduation Night. Yes, formal clothes. I've already bought the shirt and the pants, only missing a blazer or a vest, while my friend wanted to buy everything besides pants which he already have at home. I asked my dad whether if I could join him on yesterday (I know this sounds weird), but he was unhappy about me running off with my friend to go out and "play"/"Have fun" when my family is supposed to visit my grandmother. My family has a routine of visiting my grandmother on alternate Sundays, in which yesterday was the Sunday we're supposed to go. I've gotta face my dad's unhappiness. I mean, why should I always join you to visit grandmother? I can spend my time doing something more productive, like perhaps looking for clothes, enjoying myself or revising for my exams. Definitely not going to my grandmother's house, take a look at my grandmother and my relatives and stone there for hours doing absolutely nothing. Counting the days I've been a baby, a toddler, a kid then a teenager, how many Sundays have I missed out because of this ridiculous routine? Of course, visiting my grandmother is being filial, and we should do it. But just taking a few Sundays out wouldn't hurt and I only did ask for a few times to let me off. 
Another thing is about the blazer I have found in the search of clothes (my dad allowed me to go in the end). Is a SGD $79.90 considered costly for a blazer? There are a lot more expensive ones. I've found the cheapest which suits me fine in terms of colour and material. As I dialled my dad to confirm buying that blazer, he's like "So expensive? You only will use it once or twice." And I can hear the "It's a waste of money" tone in his comment. Come on, the price is the cheapest. Everybody is fine with that price. Most people are buying more expensive ones without much consideration. Why? Coz' it's a once-in-a-lifetime event. There's not gonna be another secondary school graduation night. We are not very likely to meet up as often as we do with our friends and classmates now. It's for our best memories. We sure have to look our finest, don't we? And also, buying formal clothes obviously need more money. The price is considered reasonable, and I'm not asking for more. My parents really have to change their mindset. I'd bet they thought I'm a spoilt brat thinking that money is easily earned, not understanding their pain, and spending unnecessary. I didn't ask for much. I probably have one of the least luxuries among my classmates. I DO understand their efforts to earn money and I'm saving for them also. I CHOSE not to spend unnecessarily. But there are things that I have to spend a little more for. Like memories, like once-in-a-lifetime events. 


If you say "It's a waste of money. You are only wearing it for a few hours? One or two times? It's unnecessary."
I will rebut "If you are down with some illness and need, let's say, a liver transplant in order to continue living for maybe a few months? A year? Two if lucky? And I'll need to spend tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars for the surgery just to see a old man or woman live for mere one or two years at most, how do you think I'd feel? Unnecessary, a definite waste of money IF I'm looking from the same viewpoint as you now. Maybe I'd just let you die?" 
But if I look at it a different way, like I'm saving a person who's dear to me. Letting him/her live for another one or two more years. Exchanging money for life. Now, is that worth it?

Graduation Service

When you leave here, don't forget why you came. - Adlai Stevenson, to college graduates


Today I shall break away from my usual topics concerning "Re". Yes, the title says it all. It's Graduation Day today. It's gonna be the final time we step into our school chapel as its students and attend a service. We are graduates now. I still remember the first day I officially step into this school as its student. I told myself "It's gonna be a rough but short stay here. Perhaps I'll miss this place and the people here when I graduate from this school". Now I fully understand why I am such a prophet. Because right now, I am already a graduate and I do miss this school now. Well, at least I will miss my schoolmates and a few teachers including my favourite form teacher: Mr Sherman See. About 10 hours removed from the end of today's graduation service, I'm already starting to miss the days we had together as a class. Good 'old' days indeed. Heh, I am going to be a prophet once again and say now: "I am definitely going to sit down somewhere comfortable (or maybe having a hard time in post-secondary school education) in the near future, looking back and reminisce about my days in secondary school and my awesome class 4 Endurance." Also, I assume that my future self will even write a blog post titled "Reminisce". 
It has been 4 years already. Time really flies. From the kid who step into this school, I became a better person after these 4 years. I don't feel good about this school from the start, always wanted secondary school life to end quickly. From Sec 1 to Sec 2... It's been an fairly uninteresting journey for the first two years. But things completely changed when I entered Sec 3 and ended up in 3 Endurance(which is now 4 Endurance' 2011). It had been a wonderful, amazing journey with the rest of 4E. I can totally say that it's my best class. I am really emotional right now (no I am not crying. Yet. Or maybe not after all), and although we still have one more week together as students due to an intensive study timetable at school, we will not spend as much time together as we used to in the near future, when we finish our O-levels. 
When I first arrive in this school, I used to daydream that if I ever build a time machine, I would go back in time to my primary school days. But ever since 3E/4E came into my life, I would want to go back to our secondary school days instead. It's only been a short 2 years. I only feel like we only did spend a 100 days together as a class. The cohort has also been a great one too. I really hope that every single one of us will shine brightly as we continue our lives and step into the future. I will definitely remember every single classmate from 4E. If I don't, feel free to punch me. Really love you guys. We love 4E, Sherman See!!


Don't cry because it ended,but cry because it happened.

Reconcile

Reconciliation is to understand both sides; to go to one side and describe the suffering being endured by the other side, then go to the other side and describe the suffering being endured by the first side.


Quarrels often occur among family, friends and colleagues at work. We all know that. I seriously doubt that there's no one that has not quarrelled (not counting babies and toddlers) with someone else even once. There are infinite reasons for the quarrels people have with one another. Being extremely rude, having a different point of view, getting irritated or seriously annoyed, getting left out by a particular group and so on. I said there are infinite reasons so I'm obviously not gonna state everything out. When's the last time you quarrel with someone and after everything that had happened between you and that person, and when you think about it, will you feel silly and stupid for quarrelling with that person because the reason for quarrelling is very stupid when you realised it? A lot of people feel that way after some heated argument with a friend or a family member. However, in every quarrel that has brought things too far, the people involved has to reconcile with each other. We will have to sit down and talk things over so that both parties will understand each other, realise their faults on the matter and make corrections so that similar events will not occur once more, keeping their friendship or family ties alive. And of course', apologies are definitely necessary. However, there are people who does not seek reconciliation. These people who don't seek reconciliation probably have their own reasons. I have a friend who quarrelled with another friend of mine, and they did not really speak or communicate with each other any more ever since their quarrel. These two were best of pals in the past, when they are both the clowns of my class. But ever since that incident, they don't associate with each other any more. When the "Brotherhood" (a.k.a my clique) goes out to have lunch, only one of them will be present with the other absent. Now, even as we plan to create a event, one did not want the other to be present. It's obvious that he wanted a fun experience of the rest of us together and did not wish for the other to be present and make things awkward or spoil the fun. This may actually seem to be a valid reason for him, but I feel that it's best to reconcile with someone you quarrelled with, so as to mend the broken ties and continue to have a fun time together. You will have to try to understand each other, and be in the other's shoes to realise what you might have done to hurt or angered him/her. Also, I must say that there will be people who you will not want to reconcile with or associate with any more, maybe due to his/her personality or habits which you either very dislike or find it difficult to accept, or he/she did something terrible to you or someone you care about. Well, that will be another case. But don't make that an excuse to not reconcile with anyone though.

Review

Only those with narrow minds fail to see that the definition of impossible is "Lack of imagination and incentive." - Serena Butler


My scores are my preliminaries are rather a joke (for now at least, since I still have not get back a few of my other papers), coz I either do quite well, or I fail. I've scored A1 for English Language overall, which is a surprise for me since I always don't do so well for my English. My composition was the one who pulled me up to this grade. Technically, I've scored 27/30 for my essay writing, which is rather impossible. Yes, it is considered impossible to score that high for my essay writing. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw my script. The topic I wrote for my essay writing was "Ambition", which is the most badly done averagely among the entire cohort among the five topics you can choose from. As I've read a book about the rivalry and relationship between the two NBA legends, Larry Bird and Earvin 'Magic' Johnson, I decided to write about it, about both their deep ambitions to defeat each other and clinch championships for their teams, and also their influence on next-generations NBA players whom started to share the same ambitions as them after they have seen their epic battles: To become the greatest. To win.
Yes, I've scored 27/30 for that, no mistaking it. The teacher who marked my script commented about how I really sound like a sports journalists and how perhaps I should really become one since I do have the passion and talent for writing about sports. Maybe I should really consider becoming a sports journalist. 
Another surprise is my Social Studies (SS) results. I almost always get 23/50 for my SS Exams, and it almost made me hate that number, and almost made me nickname myself 'Michael Jordan 23' when it comes to receiving SS papers. Guess what did I get this time? 40/50. That's insane for me. I had totally no idea I would ever score that high for my SS in my life. I always fail my SS exams. This is the first time I have ever passed a major SS exam. It was always impossible for me, but now it's proven. It can be done.
I have failed my A-Math (as usual), my Geography (as usual also) and my Physics (this is time was too difficult for us, even our teachers says so). Tomorrow, I am receiving my History Paper which is the other half of my Combined Humanities Subject together with SS, and my Chemistry paper which I am 'destined to fail'. If I scored high enough in History that will secure me an A1 for Combined Humanities, I will have a joke for my prelim results. Though I know it's gonna be tough, I'm gonna strive hard for all my subjects. I'm gonna turn the tide around this time. I'm not gonna fail again. Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently. It's not impossible to do well for certain subjects. It's only a matter of effort. Perhaps luck too. You know the Adidas catchphrase? "Impossible is Nothing."

Resign

It is said of Muad'dib that once when he saw a weed trying to grow between two rocks, he moved one of the rocks. Later, when the weed was seen to be flourishing, he covered it with the remaining rock. "That was its fate," he explained. - The Commentaries

Sometimes things just don't go your way. They just don't. No matter how much you want something to happen, to come true, or to appear in your eyes, they just will not respond the way you want it to. It's said to be foolish to fight against 'fate', because it will happen the way it is meant to be. I mean, why try to change something that cannot be changed? But are things really that way? Are our lives really already planned out, and we can do absolutely nothing to change it? We don't really know, do we?

I screwed up my A-Math papers. Completely. Although I did put in some effort into studying, and I thought that I finally got the trick, the questions in the papers are so far ahead of my practice and understanding, and I am always unable to grasp the advanced concept which almost everyone else already did. I am always a step behind, sometimes more than just one step behind.
Other than that, I encountered another one. I messaged this friend of mine to wish her good luck for the Literature Paper, then she told me about her group requiring just one more person to fill the 10 people criteria for a table at Graduation Night. As she sounded in need, I offered to help by transferring one of our guys(I am sitting with Brotherhood members which makes up 10 exactly), to her group and persuade another guy who we are quite close with to join our table. I know that this probably will not be a good idea coz' we are the 'Brotherhood' and we should sit together at Graduation Night, and not one of us should be left out. Still, after offering to help, I didn't want to disappoint her, so I asked a guy to transfer to that group which he agreed to, and awaiting reply from another guy who we are persuading to join us in his place. Being the prophet I am, I foresaw the reaction from a few members from the 'Brotherhood' when the guy who is transferring out of our table to join her table. They were like obviously didn't want him to leave and thought that he abandoned us for a girl he likes (which is in that group). Yes, I know it's too melodramatic but one person in our group is really that dramatic. After all my efforts to get things settled and almost ready to tell her that it's settled, the person who originally transferring out messaged me that there is no longer a need to help her fill in the last empty space as they already gotten someone to join them. After everything I've done, it felt like I was told straight in my face that I am longer needed. Of course since I was the one who offered to help in the first place, I shouldn't complain about being no longer needed, but it really struck me hard when I received the news. Because I knew that there was a chance that she may find someone else before I do before it even happened. I am a little afraid that it will happen coz' I honestly wanted to help her and all I wanted perhaps was a words of thanks and gratefulness, if nothing else. But things usually don't go our way. Not just mine and yours, but everyone else in the world. It's sad, coz' sometimes we always fail to notice those little things that make our day. However, don't you just hate it when something important to you always don't respond in the way you really wanted it to? Maybe I should really resign myself to 'Fate'.

My most sincere apologies. I have not posted anything since more than a week. Yes, my Prelims Part 2 has started today. It has been very stressful and busy on me these days coz' I've got to study for all these examinations in preparations of the quickly approaching O-Levels. Just a little update. I will continue to post after my prelims which will all end with the only exception of Chemistry Paper 1, like in about 3 days? Gotta stay focused~

Reminder (Part 2)

You do not take from this universe. It grants you what it will. - Paul Muad'dib

This is continued from the previous post "Reminder" below.
Speaking of reminders, my good friend has got deeply reminded of his seemingly foolish decision he made by a coincidental meeting with the girl he likes. Today. Yes, the same day of the event I wrote about in my previous post "Reminder". Well, actually it took place about a couple of hours before the event I wrote about in "Reminder". He actually didn't notice her at first, when he, two more buddies and me, took the escalator up, and I spotted a very familiar person whom I immediately suspected was her with her friends, taking the escalator down. It was a dramatic cross of paths, as we took the escalator up, and they took the escalator down, just right next to each other. No words were exchanged, simply because she perhaps didn't recognise or see me (she seems to look towards me when I saw her, which I quickly turned away my gaze to avoid the awkardness) or she didn't care to acknowledge me (She and I were primary school classmates too, but not very close), or the same reasons I mention above for my good buddy (whom she may be really looking at since they were closer, and secondary school schoolmates).
My buddy still didn't notice her (or at least I thought so), till we got off the escalator and I remarked "I think I've just saw someone familiar." He immediately looked down the escalator. My two other friends didn't get it coz' they don't know her. But my buddy saw and knew it was her. After that, he acted normal for a while and after we had dinner, he began to keep to himself, stayed very quiet and his mind seems to be drifting away. The rest of us can easily see that he has a problem. I'm the only one that knew, coz' he'd only told me among the rest of us. It was really hard for him, to be reminded of her, reminded of his terrible, foolish mistake that had led to undesirable consequences, reminded of his feelings for her which he tried to forget. The jewellery shop, her physical being, that constant avoiding, would make a constant reminder for his shattered love-life. I hope that he will not fall easily.

Reminder

You do not take from this universe. It grants you what it will. - Paul Muad'dib

It is proven. It has been proven every single time I'd asked for it. Something is "controlling" us. Or rather, something is making decisions and arrangements for our actions and movements. It would seem so logical that something will happen. Maybe it's God. Maybe it's some divine power. Maybe it's fate. I don't know, and I am not trying to be religious here so I would not elaborate further. But it is just so obvious. I can't help but think that our lives are actually planned out.
Almost every year after graduating from primary school, we would meet each other at this period of time by coincidence. The Teacher's Day period. I still remember the times I've met you. All the times I've met you were at one particular place. Causeway Point/Civic Centre. Every single time. It really was unexpected most of the times. Today, this year, I've met you again. I was pulling the glass door to exit from McDonald's and I looked down at a person sitting down directly in front of me, who smiled at me. "You look so familiar" was my first thought. Then I quickly realised who I'm looking at. It's a very shocking yet precious moment for me. I gave a sign of acknowledgement, smiled back and strolled away. I then turned back and waved goodbye. In my mind then was "OH MY GOD, I saw her". My buddies who were beside me didn't even notice her at first until I said "Guys, turn back."
I'm still a little confused now, but I'm quite positive that it was meant to be like that. This period of time and the unexpected "bumping into each other" events serve as a constant reminder of my feelings. Every single time I bumped into you, I am reminded of the feelings I have for you. However, it still seem that only a miracle will allow "IT" to happen. But, as always, I believe in miracles.

Results (Part 1)

My nights are going sleepless, my days are going useless. So I asked GOD, “is this love?”. GOD replied, “No dear, results is near”. - Random Tweets

I've got my Chinese O-Level Results today. In the morning, I started having anxiety attacks already. As the minute-hand ticked by and getting closer to 10:50am (when we are supposed to proceed to the hall and collect our results), I was already shivering a little. 15 minutes to 10:50am, I'm feverish. I am really stressed up coz' I am the top in Chinese in my school and everybody expects me to get an A1 grade for the subject. Also, I needed this subject to put into my L1R5 points to go on to post-secondary education. I admit I'm giving myself too much pressure and expectations, but who wouldn't? On the day of the Chinese O-Levels Exam, I received a really special "Good Luck" message of a certain someone and it really made me feel obliged to score an A1.
Then the time came. My heartbeat was seriously fast. I knew that today and the day early next year when we collect our overall O-Level Results, that I will be really anxious. But, it's not what I've imagined. It feels a lot worse. Then my name was called, and I strode to the table where the teacher shows me my score. XXXXX (1) (D). The teacher explained the number and alphabet to me, but I already got the idea. A1 and Distinction for Oral Examination. I did it!!
However, to my utter dismay, there're others who I expected to do well and they did not capitalize. Even so, on the average, we all did quite well. It was sad to see my friends shed tears, looking so down and dispirited and as a couple of them called their parents to inform them of their "below expectations" results, I could only just stand by and listen, perhaps encouraging them to strive if they decide to retake the examination in November. Everytime people gather together to collect exam results, especially graduation results, there will always be people who are pleased and satisfied with their results, people who feel disappointed and people who just keep ranting about something that caused them to do badly. The next time, I will post part 2. That's when I collect my overall O-Levels Results. But right now, I should be studying for it and the prelims up ahead.